You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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