I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
