Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
