Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize
