I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
