So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
