I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
