Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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