The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize