She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
