had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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