If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
