I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Randomize
