Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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