So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
