btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
