If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
