It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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