We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
