I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
