Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I need water and some morals
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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