im drinking this country out of the recession.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
