her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
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