I smell stomach acid.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
