so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
