3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
