Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
i think i just naturally attract stoners
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
