you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
