"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
