This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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