Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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