somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
