you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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