She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
