oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
