Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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