love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize