Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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