1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Randomize
