I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Randomize
