hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
