Where are you?
In a non slutty way
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
