Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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