thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Randomize
