I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize