I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
love makes seman taste better
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
