got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Randomize
