you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
