I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
