drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Randomize
